Doom

15 Nov 2003

All the details of the new China Blog List nearing completion, I spent a few moments the other day reading some of the newer blogs. One of the ones I really liked was Doom in China. His entry entitled “Five Reasons Why I’m the Greatest English Tutor in All of China (and Maybe the World)” was hilarious. I enjoyed his “Big Holes, Monkey Voices, and Chicken Toes” hiking story as well. He summed it up very nicely at the end:

Mr. Quan looked at me and said, “I don’t want to go back to my apartment. I don’t want to go back to work tomorrow. I don’t want this weekend to be over.”

I nodded. I told him there were times in my life in the past when I felt the same thing — the dull ache of daily routine piling up on you. I told him, that is why I was happy to be in China.

Further down the page, in “Chinese Cultural Intricacies” he tells about CCTV’s plans for a miniseries in which he will play the role of an evil foreigner:

The television mini-series is about a country filled with greedy white foreigners (maybe Iceland?) attacking a small helpless Island filled with Chinese people (maybe San Francisco?) for its rich oil deposits. I don’t know where they came up with this script (maybe CNN?), but I think this will be a winner.

Jamie Doom only plans to be in China until next summer.

Share

John Pasden

John is a Shanghai-based linguist and entrepreneur, founder of AllSet Learning.

Comments

  1. The best is his latest post:

    I Dont Teach Stupid English Words. You will never hear Linda (see picture) say the word hello. In fact if you greet her with hello, you are just as likely to get a mouth full of stick as any other response. Linda (see picture) says hi like normal people. To explain why hello is so harmful here in China, first let me give you a little history. A long time ago China invented a little something called Chinese water torture, here in China known simply as water torture. In the ancient past, this was an effective means of making people crack/tell them secrets/agree to let them have the Olympics. But this is a new century now, and their methods are much more subtle than water torture. Now they use the ingenious hello torture instead. Some people (foreigners for instance) are subjected to thousands and thousands of hellos every day. Like the drops of water before it, it doesnt seem so bad at first. At first, like the water, it seems refreshing. Quickly it becomes too much. Everywhere these people go they hear thousands of hellos. It usually ends tragically with some timid ESL teacher going crazy and punching some poor street vender in the face, getting kicked out of China, then going on Daves ESL Caf and complaining about his school. Other useless or harmful English words or phrases I shelter my pupil from are: politically correct, Yesterday Once More and boy bands.
    I Have Never Visited the Daves ESL Caf Website. Somebody told me about it, and I took their advice and never visited that website. So the way I see it, Im automatically five times smarter than any ESL tutor who has.
    Wilson (Racingmix) | Email | Homepage | 11.15.03 – 9:19 pm | #

    Wilson,

    Well, yeah, I said the latest post was hilarious. That’s why I linked to the article.
    John | Email | Homepage | 11.16.03 – 1:04 am | #

    John,

    Thanks for the love. I have actually thought about putting off going back to the States getting a teaching gig in Hangzhou (maybe Hangzhou University) when my time here is up. Would you advise it? Thanks for all the hard work on behalf of the China Bloggers. — Doom
    jamie | Email | Homepage | 11.16.03 – 9:34 pm | #

    I enjoy Doom’s style. Maybe he could put together a book a la “Dave Berry Does Japan”?
    Tim | 11.18.03 – 8:37 am | #

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *