Monday, January 19, 2004
It's the Patriots and Panthers in Superbowl XXXVIII!!!!
(and who the fuck cares?)
Well the Philadelphia Eagles, for the third straight year, have choked like a midget on a stallion's cock in the NFC Championship Game and I for one was hardly surprised. I love my Eagles and Donovon McNabb (and Chunky Soup) but I have to admit that after staying up all night to watch the game (which meant sobering up without sleep which sucks) the last thing I wanted streaming across my computer in realtime was two and a half hours of futility in what has got to be the most fruitless, barren debacle orchestrated by a professional football team. It breaks your heart, and now we have a superbowl game being played by two teams that enjoy the attraction and drawing power of a one-legged monkey that sweats ebola.
I'm sure Bostonians and the fine people of the Carolinas will be happy that their teams will be duking it out on the gridiron for the national championship, but considering the rest of the country despises these regions of the country for being populated by either violent drunkards or incestuous hillbillies I don't think advertising agencies, nor the networks will be banking on record revenues or ratings. Might I recommmend for the half-time show a joint performance between the Boston Police Gaelic Column and Smokey Mountain Jug and Washboard Ensemble. This Superbowl will be the U.S. geographical equivalent to Tampa Bay, Florida. Which is to say its going to be a great big crappin' mass of hooey no one gives a shit about.
Needless to say, this Superbowl I'll not be travelling to some sports bar to get drunk while basking in America's greatest sporting tradition. No I will be taking a vigorous consitutional and will be travelling around China.
PS: I'm still a little bitter over the Eagles loss.
PPS: Leather (pseudonym) wanted me to put in something about the Packers, so I'll say they are a fine team. And an American institution. They don't have much to be proud of up in that homogenously white state of theirs' except low tier macrobrews like Shlitz, and Milwaukee's best. I mean these are a people that think interracial dating means having a partner from Toronto.
PPPS: I honestly have nothing against people from New England (including the greater Boston metropolitan area) or the Carolinas.
(and who the fuck cares?)
Well the Philadelphia Eagles, for the third straight year, have choked like a midget on a stallion's cock in the NFC Championship Game and I for one was hardly surprised. I love my Eagles and Donovon McNabb (and Chunky Soup) but I have to admit that after staying up all night to watch the game (which meant sobering up without sleep which sucks) the last thing I wanted streaming across my computer in realtime was two and a half hours of futility in what has got to be the most fruitless, barren debacle orchestrated by a professional football team. It breaks your heart, and now we have a superbowl game being played by two teams that enjoy the attraction and drawing power of a one-legged monkey that sweats ebola.
I'm sure Bostonians and the fine people of the Carolinas will be happy that their teams will be duking it out on the gridiron for the national championship, but considering the rest of the country despises these regions of the country for being populated by either violent drunkards or incestuous hillbillies I don't think advertising agencies, nor the networks will be banking on record revenues or ratings. Might I recommmend for the half-time show a joint performance between the Boston Police Gaelic Column and Smokey Mountain Jug and Washboard Ensemble. This Superbowl will be the U.S. geographical equivalent to Tampa Bay, Florida. Which is to say its going to be a great big crappin' mass of hooey no one gives a shit about.
Needless to say, this Superbowl I'll not be travelling to some sports bar to get drunk while basking in America's greatest sporting tradition. No I will be taking a vigorous consitutional and will be travelling around China.
PS: I'm still a little bitter over the Eagles loss.
PPS: Leather (pseudonym) wanted me to put in something about the Packers, so I'll say they are a fine team. And an American institution. They don't have much to be proud of up in that homogenously white state of theirs' except low tier macrobrews like Shlitz, and Milwaukee's best. I mean these are a people that think interracial dating means having a partner from Toronto.
PPPS: I honestly have nothing against people from New England (including the greater Boston metropolitan area) or the Carolinas.
